Gossip

 Someone in our small group brought up a devotional about gossip. It sparked some good discussion about what is gossip. I think of two examples.

Person A talks about how this or that person made them feel bad. They did something to hurt person A. This person even has special code phrases. Their words sounded like they were just sharing, letting me inside their head. They recounted events like facts. They complained. And nothing changed. 

Person B sounds, to my ears, very similar to person A. They talk about their interactions with other people. Describe what happened, how they felt, internalizes what happened, and deals with the relationship. Person B also complains about their job and coworkers from time to time. Then deals with the problem.

I believe person A gossips and person B does not. Why? For person B, I'm a sounding board. They have not asked me to take their problem or assume responsibility. Sometimes, person B wants my input. And sometimes, they simply need to share a burden. Person B asks for strength and wisdom. These are things that I can give.

Person A expected something from me - usually judgement against another person. Other times they expected me to assume their responsibility. I think this is a major component of gossip. The gossiper takes something from the person listening. They take something that isn't mine to give.

Not a very satisfying definition, is it?