Rules for Living

In an earlier post, I mentioned some simple rules that I follow. A friend asked me what those rules were. I have to admit that I don't know (or realize) all of them. One that stood out today - no one wants to listen. My life is boring. I don't tell a good story. And no one really wants to listen to me complain. Or that's the rationalization.

So that begs the question - what am I rationalizing? Talking is hard. I don't know why. I have never been able to follow conversations. This goes back to that system 1 (the automatic system) and system 2 (the thinking system). I live the majority of my life in the thinking system (2). Conversations rely heavily on the automatic system (1). Try this little experiment - list out the cues you use to know when it's your turn to speak. I'll wait...

My guess is that you couldn't really come up with many. Certainly not a comprehensive list. Then add the extra complexity that every person involved is different - sending out different signals. The thinking system works with rules and algorithms. What's the algorithm for something you can't define? I don't know either. So it takes a lot of mental energy to figure out when it's okay to speak. I just don't have that kind of time. Thinking is slow.

Now let's add one more dimension - the lies we tell ourselves. I lie to myself. That's what rationalization is - a lie I tell myself to justify something I want to do (usually something wrong). I know that I do this. And I spend energy vetting the things I say. So not only do I expend energy thinking about when to say it, but also what to say. Is it appropriate? Is it selfish? Am I complaining or expressing emotion in a healthy way? What is the algorithm for that?

Want to know how I came up with the last paragraph? It's exactly what went through my head when I decided to write this. Seriously, I almost went for my walk first and did the dishes, I've found these things are blocks. They are blocking me from doing the thing God asked me to do. Why? Because I'm still broken and my human nature is directly opposed to what God wants. My natural instinct is to do anything but what He asked me to do. I block His voice by filling my time with other stuff. Some of it may be important or valuable. But it's not what He asked me to do right in this moment.

In The Artist's Way, author Julia Cameron gives 10 principle of creativity. One that really stands out to me is the refusal to be creative is self-will and is counter to our true nature. Blocks represent a refusal to be creative. God is a creator. The Bible even starts that way - in the beginning, God created. The things He commands us to do are creative - build up people, build things, do something that makes the world a little better than it was. My refusal to obey Him is a refusal to be creative. And it is putting my will over His.

Rules and Laws

So now I'm going to totally change direction and make one last point. The apostle Paul, in one of his letters, says that we're no longer under the law of sin and death, but the law of life. What exactly is the law of life?

The law of sin and death he referred to meant the old Mosaic law. You know, the 10 commandments, the book of Deuteronomy, all that Old Testament stuff - obey or else. To the Jews it meant dietary restrictions, work restrictions, rules about how to do things. And these were very detailed laws. Breaking one meant that you had to kill an animal. Seriously, something had to die.

That law was specifically designed to point out everything you did wrong. Nobody, and I mean nobody, could possibly keep it perfectly. Jesus even came along later and said that merely thinking about breaking it was exactly the same as breaking it. This is the law of sin and death. Hopeless. Mean. Disheartening.

But Jesus kept that law. And He still suffered the penalty for breaking it - death. He did that in our place. So, as Paul says, put us under the law of life. Imagine your entire life laid out as marbles. Each marble represents something you did. And we sort them into two bowls - good and bad. The law of sin looked at the bad bowl. When Jesus took our sin, the bad bowl goes away. What's left?

Well, the good bowl of course. See? The old law focused on what you did wrong. The new law looks at what you did right. The old law brought a penalty for failure. The new law is about a reward for success. This is what Paul means by law of life. You get something for following it. Not lose something when you don't.

Now read Galatians 5 with this in mind. We are free from the penalty. No matter what you do, there is no penalty. Paul then goes to the flip side - do good things because you're building a reward. Yes, you can do anything, but why would you want to miss out on everything God wants to give you?

So now answer this question, are you afraid of someone who is looking for a reason to give you what you want? Well no. We're afraid of people who want to hurt us. The old law hurt. The new law - life - is all about our good. We're no longer slaves. I don't have to worry about the times I fail. I can find God's peace in the moments I obey.

I'll admit, that's still hard for me to live. My feelings tell a different story.